Tummy Time!

Look at Those Eyes

Sean is Mr. Bright eyes, so big and blue.

Making Cupcakes

And we're waiting... And waiting... Melanie & Capri decorating

BOB Jogger

Look how cute Sean is in this jogging stroller. Duane says he looks like a flower. I can't wait to start running with this with Meanie riding her bike. This stroller is AWESOME!

Mama's Milk (Pumping, Feeding, Storing) **warning....bare skin**

This is what I have to do everyday. Pump. While pumping, especially in the middle of the night, giving Sean a bottle. Look at all this extra milk. I am so thankful that I can produce all this milk. I finally talked Duane into buying a small deep freezer from craigslist. Breast milk doesn't last as long in a traditional freezer as it does in a deep freezer. I don't want to waste a drop. I plan on pumping for as long as I can-one year is my goal. So if I can give Sean breast milk long after one year...HALLELUJAH! Speaking of not wasting a drop, even Brownie gets to have Sean's leftovers. I give it to her when Sean has had his fill and it's too old to be put back in the fridge or frozen. What a lucky dog! I have seen 2 lactation consultants and contacted the La Leche League. Part of me has accepted that I won't be able to breast feed this cutie patutie baby. But the other part of me, the part that I firmly believe is doubled in Sean, STUBBORNESS, believes that he may one day find comfort and pleasure and nutrition from breast feeding. So I keep trying. Down Syndrome babies CAN breast feed. I've read it, I heard it, I've seen it. Sean has breast fed, with & without a nipple shield. With and without a SNS. So today we're headed back to our super awesome lactation lady. :-)
Sean Nursing on 3-27-14 3-31-14 4-25-14

Blessings

Even before I knew what to pray for or how to be in life God knew. HE knew what I needed and what was written in my heart. I believe God gave all of my children and my husband to me for a purpose.

 

-Kyle was given to me to help teach me to grow up, mature, become responsible and do something respectable with life. He was my angel in a dark hour. I wasn't acting very responsibly nor was I doing anything productive before Kyle came along. Although it took me a few years, without Kyle in my life to be responsible for I have NO idea where I'd be now. That is truly a blessing.

 

-Melanie was gifted to me to teach me about the kind of mama I was capable of becoming. To teach me optimism, kindness, how to be open minded and flexible. Forgiveness. To teach me about Jesus. To teach me what the most important things in life really are. It's not stuff.

 

-I don't know how long I've been asking for this in heart and out loud in prayer, but patience is what I've always needed and longed for.  I still need it.  I've been asking God for patience for a long time.  I've been asking God for another baby for a long time.  Ever since I really learned about adoption through my very special friend Rebekah, I've been asking God to help me "help the least of these."  Asking him what my part could be?  Would it be to adopt, to financially support them through donations either via orphanage or someone raising money to step out in the unknown and adopt or just emotionally support people and encourage the ones that have the courage to step out in faith and do what God has asked?  God has a plan for me and I want to know what that plan is.  Then July 28th., I saw the pregnancy test that would change my (our) life.  God answered (1 of) my prayer(s)!!!!  I was going to have another baby.  Whoop, whoop!!!

 

-When Sean was born I was scared.  I was shocked.  I was sad.  I was mad (mostly at my midwife).  None of that was because he was diagnosed with Down Syndrome.  It was because he was whisked away nearly after birth and would be transferred to a Children's Hospital.  We would not be bonding or nursing or cuddling or smelling each other, looking at one another.  We wouldn't be doing either of those things.  At least not right away.  It was because he had to have abdominal surgery for his Duodenal Atresia.  It wasn't until Sean came home that I started to be wary of my abilities of parenting a Down's baby.  Just because I'm a pediatric nurse for Special Needs, doesn't mean I know what I'm doing with my own Special Needs child.  :-)

But here is where I remember that God is looking out for me and has my best interest at heart, and this is the path I'm supposed to be on.  Down Syndrome children require patience.  They require optimism, flexibility, open-mindedness.  And of course kindness.  Also, children with Down Syndrome are often discarded, not wanted, terminated or put up for adoption.  Can you believe it?  They are deemed one of "the least of these."  He gifted me with one of "the least of these." I can not believe how much God has enriched and blessed my life.  I am not even worthy.  Although for some reason He thinks I am.  God has answered my prayers.  He does listen.  He may not do it the way you want it or put you on the path you think you should be on and you may not understand the "why".  But, He knows what He's doing.  He doesn't make mistakes.  God listens.  God loves.   Even when I was a little girl, I can remember asking Him to give me a good husband.   Not really knowing what "good" means.  But I do now.  Where would I be without Duane?

I am so grateful.

 

 

I must say, although the good Lord has not actually given me patience, he has put things in my path for me to learn patience. What a neat idea! It makes me appreciate it all the more.

Amazing

Sometimes I worry I'm not going to be the best mom for Sean. I know that God has gifted me with him on purpose, God doesn't make mistakes, and God has a plan for me and our family with Sean. But sometimes I can't help but be concerned that I may not be the best fit. Am I giving him enough attention? Am I pushing to hard with trying to breast feed or not enough? Do I hold him enough? Am I doing right by him with...well, with anything? So with all this running through my head while giving Sean a bottle and sitting at the dinner table with Melanie, I thought out loud.
"I hope you like our family, Sean." 
Melanie's response...
"Of course he does. Especially the amazing Mama!"

Seriously? Where did that come from? You can't possibly imagine the warmth and love I felt and relief and shock all at the same time. Melanie just warms my heart. God has truly blessed me with a super sweet daughter. This world has so many critics, so much pessimism and yet she always has a smile and an encouraging word. I strive to be more like Melanie. Being her mama has taught me A LOT. I love you Melanie and I think YOU are amazing.

YIP! This Car Is Officially Ours

No more car payment, no more car payment, no more car payment!!! Today is the day $541.50 would normally be taken out to pay for this car. But not today, not next month, not ever.  This baby is officially ours! We paid off our car!  WE'RE DEBT FREE!!!! (except for our house!) Thanks to Dave Ramsey, The Total Money Makeover book and last years Financial Peace University we have changed the way we think and feel about money.   It's time to let the saving and giving begin. If you're struggling with money, don't know how to budget, or just simply want to get out of debt and don't know how to or where to start-look into Dave Ramsey. It's awesome. Life changing.  http://www.daveramsey.com/home/

Duane & Me

Daune got me a new phone for my birthday and taught me how to do a selfie! HA! Aren't we cute?

Park Trip!

See...I'm kissing on Sean all the time! First trip to the park! Melanie running around with her buddy Alex. What a cute Melanie smile.

C'mon Mom, You're Embarressing ME!

I just LOVE kissing on this baby! I wonder sometimes if it drives him crazy! HA! -